why?

Approaching 30 years of age I realize I still have long life ahead of me, theoretically, at least. Maybe it is apart of the Millennial zeitgeist of perpetual anxiety seeking fulfillment that I take this step to deepen my practice in writing–but maybe it is a part of my human-ness, too.

I’ve heard it said that we all get wounded one way or another. A big part of our journey together is finding the healing that we need both individually and as a community of relationships.

I often have wanted to listen with empathy rather than for information and even use some of that empathy for myself; as a salve for some of my own, sometimes self-inflicted, wounds. But my head has been built into a high tower: a fort with a mote and guards and has proven unassailable. This construction of my tower is, I’m sure, an act for self-preservation. For whatever reason, I have always believed that emotions were pretty terrible allies in the decision making process. I still believe that and maybe have subconsciously overreacted.

I don’t want to live and relate unaffected by those around me or even by me. This online journal is something of my effort to press into that. Jesus was crucified publicly and the satan thought he had won the cosmic battle, killing God’s son. He let his guard down, we could say. I am hoping that in the act of publishing my journal, vulnerable musings from my deeper being, my defense system will be upended and maybe dismantled a bit.

Despite this blog not being for you I hope it blesses you wherever you happen to be on your journey. Thanks for joining me on mine.